something I wrote the other night

I just got done listening to a sermon about the power of silence. That time alone with stepping outside of your thoughts and looking at what is going on. Sensing and noticing all those thoughts bouncing around. It’s an art. It was basically looking into the Bible and how the speaker was a Menonite and walked in ways that Jesus did. In the Bible so many times there’s these snippets of times where Jesus goes away. He goes away into silence. He leaves the crowd or disciples or people in general and just spends time alone. He’s not reading, not having social time nor preparing for anything. It just says he spends time in silence. And AFTER, whenever he returns he does miraculous things over and over again. He heels someone, he feeds thousands, he drives out demons. It’s always the power of what he’s been practicing comes about after he’s just been alone with himself. The speaker said that our minds and thoughts are being well refined and turned up with all the knowledge we gain, the time we spend reading our Bibles, the lectures/experiences, etc., and yet in order to catapult those learnings for power we must face up to ourselves. Our intimate inside where the answers lie. I loved how he even used the example of a driver in a car. When you pull up to a light, do you notice how you turn down the music? All your senses of sight and listening are better tuned when working together. It’s hardest for people like myself who thrive around others. I feel I gain answers when I’m around others, I feel when I’m alone too long I’m going insane because my thoughts are just continuous rampantly. I begin facing me. I had just been feeling this way today. When things come to an end, a day,a moment, a feeling is distancing itself, I have to reflect back inside to what’s always there all along. God is there. Here. He never changes. All around will fade away and nothing remains but God. I wil be let down, I will be disappointed and hurt by others. My feelings will change, my emotions will change, my rock that’s solid is going back to God and asking Him to be with me in my life. I miss my family. I miss New Zealand. I miss seeing that sunset of the Gulf of Mississippi. I miss throwing a party. I miss signing girls faces when they looked up to me. I miss opportunities to have served more. I miss opportunities to possibly make a difference or mean more to someone and be a real friend. What’s always here, and never leaves no matter what, is God. Thank you for that.
So even if I don’t end up with tickets to the World Cup, I appreciate the opportunity. I mean seeing fruits of my time here, which isn’t the purpose, is something I’m more than grateful for! Seriously! My friend Marc, who’s father owns the printing company, whom I saw last night, said he’s printing 10,000 brochures for me! Honestly! I just can’t believe it! It’s unreal! I mean I don’t even know how I’m going to distribute them all! I want to and am pumped for the opportunity because this is exactly what we’ve worked for. This is what all the prayer has come into being. I mean I have no clue if the brochures have the best information, right information, perfection it could use, but ya know what? I’m proud of it. I’m proud of all the pieces that have gone into ABSTAIN2010! Every bit has been work and passion with so many involved that’s is such a celebration for me to say there’s something tangible. And those who may take in these…I don’t know what they will read them for. I have no clue what words, pictures, statistics, website, or just words that go with the knowledge and eye opening that ABSTAIN is all about. I just pray, as we do, that it reaches people. Yes dad, even if it’s just 1 
So this gives me the thriving desire now to travel. I would love more than anything to be able to travel around this country distributing flyers and speaking with people. Feeling the whole vibe of this world cup is unbelievable but just the presence and a purpose, with a tool of abrochure is a dream come true. This is what we sought after awhile ago, and I’m going to see it out. I know that I won’t be getting to do much playing soccer myself, I won’t get to do this or that, but I am here to be involved and finish a task that was begun at hand with God’s presence speaking into my life. I have no idea if I have the funds to travel, I have no idea if I have the funds for tickets, or to even get nice shampoo and conditioner tomorrow, but what I do know, is God always takes care of me. He does this for all of us. I just have to ask.
Mike Packy said he has a ticket for me for sure of New Zealand vs Paraguay, however it’s in Polawkane and also it may be schetchy of no promise that since it’s in his name, that I can get in with it. Marc claims there’s a transfer that we can do, and we all honestly don’t believe that FIFA will check passports at all the matches. This is all ifs and buts though. I met some Ozzie’s last night who said they have an extra ticket to all the Australian matches, which are in Durban, Rustenberg, and Jo berg, however it’s like $180 each and I have to get there. I said I’d email them since I met them at a pub last night when I went out with my great hosts from Ireland, Ben and Sean. Yes they took me to long street and we had a lovely time. I met the Ozzies though and they even would love to know of some volunteer work they can be involved with. Oh so so great! Have to speak about more, but it’s been exciting already. Not too many tourists yet, but they’re coming slowly. Saw the Chillians, Mexicans, Argentians, English and Americans so far. But it’s all happening and I’m here. I’ll write more late, I’m exhaustedly tired and getting up early to head into town to distribute more and do some research on travel. Please keep it all in your prayers 